You, too, are probably mistreated in one way or another. You might be overlooked, blamed, discriminated against, criticized in one context or another. But you still have the choice to see the other as a whole person. That is what great people did: they did not become bitter by their unjust treatment and saw others only as demons or caricatures. They saw them as people: a mix of good and bad intentions and actions, just like we all are.
That may be easier said that done. My invitation is to keep looking at yourself. When you feel bothered by others, please check:
Are you holding yourself to the same standards as you are demanding of them? When they slack – are you allowing yourself to slack off somewhere?
Keep looking at yourself
Self-deception and justification are often subconscious, also because our conventional-mechanistic mindsets run deep. We were brought up with people who were more important than others, who were entitled, that had the one best answer and knew best. Authority figures used command and control and modeled self-interest instead of other-focus and contributing to the good of the whole. We might be blinded.
Abiding by the same rules as the others creates a safe space – and signals that we’re equal as human beings. Different rules and rights signals that the others are less – they are objects. It would be best if there are no privileges for the leaders. When you don’t play by different rules as a leader that’s energizing for the organization.
If you want to be a positive agent, here’s your true assignment:
Foster a deep appreciation for the people around you, regardless of rank or position. Regardless of whether they do as you say or not.
When you treat others right, you don’t need justification. You don’t need to dwell upon the mistreatments you received to feel justified. Try to see the good and the bad in all people.
Also, don’t focus on what others are doing wrong. Focus on what you can do right to help. And don’t worry whether others are helping you. Worry whether you are helping them.
A helpful question can be:
When you judge someone, is the judgment helping them to improve? Or is it helping you to feel better?
This is book post #48 – ME
Here‘s the earlier post
The next post can be found here
If you’re confused – please start with post #1 or check the Positive Power overview and read the Positive Agent Manifesto.
Leaders, employees, consultants, citizens – everyone can make a positive difference from any position, without needing permission or resources from others. This blog will help you see positive possibilities and (re)claim your positive agency. Unstuck yourself and engage others via your interaction and actions. Transform into a positive organization where people and performance thrive.
I’m blogging my next book: “Positive Power at Work – How to make a positive difference from any position.” Your feedback is appreciated!
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Leadership is all about getting things done the way you want them done but making the doer feel involved as if it is he /she who wants it that way. To motivate, to lead from the front, to remain self motivated and enthusiastic and despite adversities, to take the TEAM along ,as Together Everybody Achieves More is the art of Leadership.